Not only does Ms. Balmaseda trash the brand new Bravo! restaurant
she also can't believe that the folks in Jupiter would ever think of
eating there. Can the people of Jupiter be so déclassé? Probably not. And, after this, fewer will probably go there.
This is how the reviews ENDS:
Diners are waiting more than an hour for a table at Bravo on busy nights. They brave the traffic, the parking woes and now a line at a mediocre chain restaurant. In Jupiter.
Quite possibly, this is a sign of the apocalypse.
Here are some excerpts from the review:
"Except for that spicy pizza and decent salad, the dishes I sampled here are neither. They not only lacked flavor nuances, they lacked identifiable flavors."
"The contents of my pasta bowl – thin wedges of chicken breast, campanelle and sauce – begged for a hint of garlic, spicy pepper flakes, fresh green onion … something."
"In this case, the finished pasta sauce was made with a base that was overly sweet and lacking in aromatics."
"Our side salads that night ($3.99 with the entrees) proved to be serviceable at best. In both the house Caesar salad and the Insalata della Casa, the greens seemed to have been tossed onto the plate with little concern for presentation."
"Bravo, after all, is the first eatery to open in the long-awaited, $150-million Harbourside Place, Jupiter’s newly baptized piazza del popolo. Yet the food tastes prepackaged."
So, Ms. Balmaseda, what do you really think? Was your dinner companion Pete Wells?
The most curious thing about Ms. Balmaseda's review was her rating of
Bravo! Cucina Italiana: B-. Why not a 'C'? Or a 'D'? How low is the bar
to get an 'A'? From this review it seems to get an 'A' all you need are
some chopped green onions, more oregano, and some staff training on
plating.
Where
else in Jupiter are diners waiting an hour to eat? The Food Shack is an excellent choice, by the way. No pizza there, but it is a foodie paradise.