Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Another ‘sign’ of progress in the City of Lake Worth Beach.

Two more Silly Red Signs (see three examples of SRS below) have disappeared!

Previous to these latest two signs that vanished there were six SRSs on North Lakeside Drive — there were three on the one side of the road and three on the other — and each was spray painted over in white with black stenciling and a gigantic arrow pointing at the sign across the street that read,

“I’m not stupid. They are!”

Please, keep your eyes out. One more SRS is unaccounted for at this point in time. But the theory is City Manager Michael Bornstein has it in his office next to another Silly Red Sign from 4 years ago.

Click on image to enlarge, one of the more
ridiculous of the Silly Red Signs:

Continue reading to learn more about SRS and another recent update as well about the SRS squad, which used to be a platoon, but that was prior to all the defections four years ago.

Before we proceed, how much do you know about:

  • Silly Red Signs (SRS)?
  • Red Sign Syndrome (RSS)?
  • Sthaltus signentititis robrusistiticus (SSR)?
  • Use this link to learn more about these topics and much more.

Do you still have a SRS? Maybe behind a bush in the backyard next to the outhouse with all the fans from World Thrift that no longer work?

Remember, there is a manual available (includes index and color tabs) with the schedule of maintenance and care requirements, e.g., bi-monthly waxings, red color enhancers (non-toxic ingredient recipes), and emergency repair instructions.

Very important:

Never, ever, use bleach on the whites!

Some SRSs have been out so long they’re leaching dangerous Chloroplast chemicals into the Lake Worth aquifier. Don’t they care about Lake Worth’s drinking water? Your pets?

You may have noticed some signs by the SRS squad are being re-purposed with cheap red spray paint. The shaky white stenciling is advertising properties “For Sale” or “For Rent” now, and sometimes both at the same time.

What must be confusing for people looking for a home, condo, or apartment is one can still see the “Hands Off” in the sign through the cheap paint. Talk about a mixed message.

Anyhow, Mark Twain understood the power of lies, like those of SRS. Here is a quote attributed to him:

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes.

So when you go around the City and see a yard with a SRS, think of them like the WWII soldiers that emerged from the jungles in the Philippines looking very confused still thinking the war was going on — years after it ended.

Anyhow, the SRS below reads, “HANDS OFF Our BEACH & POOL”? Hello. The pool was shut down and condemned last December.

Should the sign read. . .


Do you remember the original SRS? It read “HANDS OFF OUR POTHOLES”. As you can imagine, that message didn’t go over very well with the public here in this little City.